Without Conan, NBC loses college set

"I am Conan O'Brien, and I am just three days away from the biggest drinking binge in history."

Thus spoke, hilariously, the short-lived host of NBC's "The Tonight Show." Last Friday night, Conan O'Brien bade his final farewell to audiences across the country, after weeks of confusion and angst resulting from NBC's stupidity. For readers who are trying to catch up with the beginning of the semester and unable to read up on the late-night comedy drama, here is a quick synopsis.

NBC decided to move Jay Leno, the late-night legend, to a 10 p.m. spot, a notable primetime first. O'Brien was honored with Leno's previous slot on "The Tonight Show." This all tanked quicker than Blockbuster post-Netflix. In recent days, the NBC geniuses realized that putting Leno at 10 p.m. was a huge mistake and he should return to his original position. "What about Conan?" many people asked. Well, NBC offered him a 12:05 a.m. spot, after Leno's at 11:35 p.m. O'Brien was reluctant to accept this offer; five minutes past midnight is a time when television enters the twilight zone of Jimmy Kimmel and "Soul Train." He rejected NBC's proposition in the end, and we now find ourselves in a Conan-less late-night world.

I respect Leno as a comedian — he's been making me laugh for years. O'Brien, on the other hand, is much more of a cultural symbol for my generation and myself. He was a writer for two of my favorite shows, "The Simpsons" and "Saturday Night Live," and his audience is significantly younger than Leno's baby boomers. According to The New York Times, his farewell episode on Friday night was "accompanied by one of the most impressive outpourings of support by younger viewers that any late-night host had ever seen." NBC, you've just made a terrible, terrible mistake.

Until the past year or so, I thought my major network primetime viewing was limited to "The Simpsons" and "Seinfeld" on Fox. In what seemed to be one cataclysmic cyclone of hilarity, NBC released an amazing weekday lineup: Who can argue with "30 Rock," "The Office" and more recently "Community" and "Parks and Recreation"? With the new image, NBC seemed to become the network for the young, climaxing every night with O'Brien and every week with "SNL." But now that O'Brien has left the equation, the network has dug itself into a serious hole. To replace my generation's late-night representative with Leno shows NBC's ignorance. I am positive that O'Brien will host another show on a different network, and NBC will have to suffer through the loss of many young viewers.

After the Olympics finish, NBC's late-night ratings will be up in the air, and I can only assume they will be disappointing because of the degradation of this major age group. In the wake of O'Brien, I will leave you with his last wise words: "NBC and I have finally reached a separation agreement. I'd like to apologize to the guests that were scheduled for next week: President Barack Obama, the Pope, the Queen of England and our good friend, Elvis Presley." Good luck, Leno.